english ba o filipino?

yes, i am female.
i do have the necessary parts to be considered as one.
oh, but somehow androgens got in the way and decided to have a special spot in my body.
always seen. it's a bulk!
ehem*no dirty minds please.
it's a bulk! in my neck. haha!

oh but anyway.
i have never been your girly-girl type. or your typical tomboy type.
i just don't 'do' make-up, my make-up kit consists of loose powder, blush and lip balm.
TA-DA!
WTH, i'm pretty. *ehem. enough. and plus, it makes me look like i'm 'bayot' when i have too much on.
and i don't shave my legs.
and i rarely put lotion on. heck, it's hot enough in this country. but, sometimes, i do put lotion on, kahiya naman na may white scratch lines ako parati.^^
i also know next to, uh, nothing on nail care.
hmm, i would like to dress-up every once in awhile..sometimes, when i go out, i do like dressing up but before i get out of the house i change my mind and run to my room and change into my usual jeans and shirt and slippers style. *eek.

i mentioned that i was not "tomboy/butch like" because,
well, first of all, i don't look like one. and, i am not the sporty type either.
*weh.

anyway..
i don't know.

i wish for change when i'm outta here.
because, i must admit,
sometimes,
okay, MOST of the times,
guys are not the ones that turn my head when i'm walking around a mall.
girls do. *oopps! no dirty minds again please.
because i analyze what made my head turn in the first place.
was it how she dressed?
or walked?
or was it her make-up?

i'm trying to find girls to hmm, imitate, in some ways.
superficial ways, yes.
but i don't 'dress-up' or have the guts to be too different because i don't like the staring.
it's hard when your at the other end you know?
and i hateHAteHATE catcalls (or is it dogcalls?hehe) form tambays and drivers and such. *yick. haha, because, its rare that cute guys do, just them tambays.

so when i get outta here, out of the 'mapanuring mata' i wish that i'd have the guts to take care of myself better.and appreciate myself, and experiment in how i can enhance BOTH my inner and superficial self.^^
ha!